A Full House!
And I am the joker! And jokers are wild!
A full house because I have a lump on my head, a big fat, swollen lower lip and apparently an alcoholic’s red nose.
I’m the joker because all this damage was self-inflicted. Promise!
It started on Saturday. The sun was shining but the wind was blowing. When the wind blows here which is most of the time, you are confined to the great indoors. So, Flyboy and I decided that we were going to be industrious and productive and sort out our hobby room/study. Said room always resembles a bomb shelter which has been occupied for a loooooong time. I am the biggest culprit in this regard because my desk always appears to be a random act of the cosmos. However permit me to defend my sloppy habits, Flyboy’s crap is always in amongst my crap on my desk. And the process of sorting the crap out is just too tedious.
Remember when you were studying for final exams and you found all sorts of other things to do instead of study? Well, at the finish of my high school career my pot plants were flourishing and I had the prettiest nails in school. It was a similar situation on Saturday, but instead of watering my plants or doing my nails I ‘phoned Kyk. The man is a wise one indeed, he suggested we get some kites. So logical, so simple yet so perfect!
But we don’t have kites (yet) and after ending the ‘phone call with Kyk, Flyboy and I resumed our witty repartee of staring at each other saying “I’m booooooored.” Eventually in a moment of desperation I said “Let’s go to the airfield.” Somebody slap me!
So, off to the airfield after packing Metallica…
Oh yes, Metallica! Now that was an interesting trip! If anyone was on the road between Jefferys Bay and Port Elizabeth on Saturday you might have witnessed the following: A VW Jetta screaming past you and then rounding a curve to see same VW Jetta standing next to the side of the road, deader than a dodo, with two human occupants and a dog in it. That was us, the strange folk from the farm!
Anyway, we made it to the airfield with a limp, jerk and a jump! We braai-ed and The Doc (a flying friend of ours) and I polished off two bottles of wine. Needless to say I slept really, really well that night.
On Sunday we woke to the sound of gentle tapping on the hangar roof. Rain? Yes, rain – gee, surprise! As if we haven’t had enough of the damn stuff down here. Anyway, all thoughts of flying went down the toilet! And stayed there the whole day.
Shortly after my first cup of coffee I decided to indulge in a much needed nicotine fix and went outside through the little… well, silly little door in the hangar. It’s one of those dumb ones designed for midgets. Across this door on the outside is a big, thick, hard metal bar – it actually forms part of the construction of the hangar but it is way too complicated to explain. In short, one nicotine induced head rush later I turned to re-enter the hangar through aforementioned stupid little door. My hair was in the way and I didn’t see aforementioned big, thick hard metal bar and… well, I now have something that resembles a third eye on my forehead.
The strange thing is it wasn’t that sore at the time, my eyes didn’t water or anything. As the day progressed though I realised that something was throbbing between my eyes – the Bump Deluxe!
During the course of the day Flyboy ripped Metallica’s computer box out AGAIN! And this time there were five of us checking the little solder joints on the circuit board. Oooh, lookie, this one has a bit of fluff stuck to it. So I reached out to pull the “fluff” off and voila! It wasn’t fluff, it was disintegrating solder. Flyboy re-soldered the thingie and guess what!
MY CAR IS FIXED! She drove us home like a bat out of hell last night! Didn’t jerk once, didn’t cut out once, nothing, nada, zip. Just the smooth sound of her engine purring like a content tiger! It was AWESOME!
Okay, enough capitals and exclamation marks already.
Oh yes, my Angelina Jolie-like lip… here I might not have been quite sober. *blush* But I didn’t feel trashed.
Because the weather was so crummy we went out for lunch. It was wonderful! I was treated to the company of a rather charming Swiss friend of ours – this be the good looking one whose marriage is on the rocks. He is also a gemmologist (looks, personality and access to shiny rocks) and the conversation centred on gemmology, how he got into it, what is his favourite gem stone (watermelon Tourmaline I might add) and things like that. Lovely! Oh yes, I distinctly remember two bottles of red wine making an appearance at the table and then hastily departing, empty.
Back at the hangar those two bottles of red wine were causing some pressure on the bladder region of yours truly and of course I went to attend to the call of nature. As I was alighting from the porcelain throne, my hair fell in front of my eyes again and I whacked my bottom lip on the wash hand basin in front of me. This time my eyes did water – it was damn sore!
So, there I was, third eye protruding on my forehead, a pillow for a bottom lip and The Doc says to me “Why is your nose so red?” Of course, everyone turns around to inspect my nose. It was somewhat embarrassing! My nose and I have this hate/hate relationship and I honestly DO NOT like three men standing there staring at it, trying to ascertain is it red because a) it is cold or b) the owner is an alcoholic!
Okay, so a bit bruised and bashed up but all the chocolate and the wine definitely made up for it. A good weekend all in all!
Note to self: Need to find less hazardous hairstyle!
A full house because I have a lump on my head, a big fat, swollen lower lip and apparently an alcoholic’s red nose.
I’m the joker because all this damage was self-inflicted. Promise!
It started on Saturday. The sun was shining but the wind was blowing. When the wind blows here which is most of the time, you are confined to the great indoors. So, Flyboy and I decided that we were going to be industrious and productive and sort out our hobby room/study. Said room always resembles a bomb shelter which has been occupied for a loooooong time. I am the biggest culprit in this regard because my desk always appears to be a random act of the cosmos. However permit me to defend my sloppy habits, Flyboy’s crap is always in amongst my crap on my desk. And the process of sorting the crap out is just too tedious.
Remember when you were studying for final exams and you found all sorts of other things to do instead of study? Well, at the finish of my high school career my pot plants were flourishing and I had the prettiest nails in school. It was a similar situation on Saturday, but instead of watering my plants or doing my nails I ‘phoned Kyk. The man is a wise one indeed, he suggested we get some kites. So logical, so simple yet so perfect!
But we don’t have kites (yet) and after ending the ‘phone call with Kyk, Flyboy and I resumed our witty repartee of staring at each other saying “I’m booooooored.” Eventually in a moment of desperation I said “Let’s go to the airfield.” Somebody slap me!
So, off to the airfield after packing Metallica…
Oh yes, Metallica! Now that was an interesting trip! If anyone was on the road between Jefferys Bay and Port Elizabeth on Saturday you might have witnessed the following: A VW Jetta screaming past you and then rounding a curve to see same VW Jetta standing next to the side of the road, deader than a dodo, with two human occupants and a dog in it. That was us, the strange folk from the farm!
Anyway, we made it to the airfield with a limp, jerk and a jump! We braai-ed and The Doc (a flying friend of ours) and I polished off two bottles of wine. Needless to say I slept really, really well that night.
On Sunday we woke to the sound of gentle tapping on the hangar roof. Rain? Yes, rain – gee, surprise! As if we haven’t had enough of the damn stuff down here. Anyway, all thoughts of flying went down the toilet! And stayed there the whole day.
Shortly after my first cup of coffee I decided to indulge in a much needed nicotine fix and went outside through the little… well, silly little door in the hangar. It’s one of those dumb ones designed for midgets. Across this door on the outside is a big, thick, hard metal bar – it actually forms part of the construction of the hangar but it is way too complicated to explain. In short, one nicotine induced head rush later I turned to re-enter the hangar through aforementioned stupid little door. My hair was in the way and I didn’t see aforementioned big, thick hard metal bar and… well, I now have something that resembles a third eye on my forehead.
The strange thing is it wasn’t that sore at the time, my eyes didn’t water or anything. As the day progressed though I realised that something was throbbing between my eyes – the Bump Deluxe!
During the course of the day Flyboy ripped Metallica’s computer box out AGAIN! And this time there were five of us checking the little solder joints on the circuit board. Oooh, lookie, this one has a bit of fluff stuck to it. So I reached out to pull the “fluff” off and voila! It wasn’t fluff, it was disintegrating solder. Flyboy re-soldered the thingie and guess what!
MY CAR IS FIXED! She drove us home like a bat out of hell last night! Didn’t jerk once, didn’t cut out once, nothing, nada, zip. Just the smooth sound of her engine purring like a content tiger! It was AWESOME!
Okay, enough capitals and exclamation marks already.
Oh yes, my Angelina Jolie-like lip… here I might not have been quite sober. *blush* But I didn’t feel trashed.
Because the weather was so crummy we went out for lunch. It was wonderful! I was treated to the company of a rather charming Swiss friend of ours – this be the good looking one whose marriage is on the rocks. He is also a gemmologist (looks, personality and access to shiny rocks) and the conversation centred on gemmology, how he got into it, what is his favourite gem stone (watermelon Tourmaline I might add) and things like that. Lovely! Oh yes, I distinctly remember two bottles of red wine making an appearance at the table and then hastily departing, empty.
Back at the hangar those two bottles of red wine were causing some pressure on the bladder region of yours truly and of course I went to attend to the call of nature. As I was alighting from the porcelain throne, my hair fell in front of my eyes again and I whacked my bottom lip on the wash hand basin in front of me. This time my eyes did water – it was damn sore!
So, there I was, third eye protruding on my forehead, a pillow for a bottom lip and The Doc says to me “Why is your nose so red?” Of course, everyone turns around to inspect my nose. It was somewhat embarrassing! My nose and I have this hate/hate relationship and I honestly DO NOT like three men standing there staring at it, trying to ascertain is it red because a) it is cold or b) the owner is an alcoholic!
Okay, so a bit bruised and bashed up but all the chocolate and the wine definitely made up for it. A good weekend all in all!
Note to self: Need to find less hazardous hairstyle!
posted by Katt at 4:50 pm
11 Comments:
Hi Katt, thanks for your comment, great story, very funny.
Oh Katt, a third eye on your forehead - I'll be over in a bit
so you can tell me what the future holds, LOL! :)
Note to Katt : get some glasses..not a new hairstyle...;-)
Do what I do: wear a helmet. Hope you feel better soon. Painkillers are in the post.
Ag shame, it sounds like you had a bit of a eish!!! weekend!!! Don't wear a helmet as per Kyk, because then you will have a third eye, swollen lip, red nose and helmet hair!!!! heeheehee
Kevin G Brown: Sometimes fun comes with a price it seems. Or a few bruises.
GincoLeaves: Um, right now I am not too good at the future but what the hell, we can brew up some coffee. See you in a bit.
Geena: Oh grief! Had I been wearing my glasses I would probably have had glass in my eye or something.
Kyk: Don't people look at you funny when you wear a helmet to the loo?
ShortyPam: Well, if you want to but I think collagen injections are less painful. The wash hand basin is one of those treatments that come with a "Don't try this at home" label.
Buddess: Very good point you have there!
Aaaah, Katt....at least you KNOW how they happened...unlike the UDI...the unidentified drinking injury - those are the worst!
Many a morning saying....how the hell did I do that?
Ha ha... the third eye is your spiritual eye!
Definitely a good weeknd you had there. I am jealous!
What a story! : ) Glad to hear your little car is mended!
What will next week bring?
I can't wait to read your next posts.
Smooch,
The Tart
; )
OMG... 'scuse the stifled giggling katt, but maybe you need a haircut? or at least you need to tie up your hair when there's red wine in the vicinity...
oh- and send that swiss friend of yours up north when his marriage eventually falls apart won't you... oops- sorry- does that sound rude?
bygones.
the man has taste doll- have you SEEN a watermelon tourmaline!?! gorgeous!
are you feeling better today?
Dolce: That is the bizarre thing. I didn't have a hang over or feel trashed at any stage.
Chitty: Well, you are more than welcome to join us. How do you handle turbulence?
The Tart: Hey girl! Nice to see your gorgeous avatar.
Angel: The other option is you come down here. :-) He will be worth the move if you can live with flying as a passion.
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