3 Days Reduced to a Blurb...

This is tragic! I have flown 1 200kms in a certifiable vomit comet to come and visit a friend! Hold on to your knickers, we are sitting in the lounge, each on a notebook, surfing the internet. And flipping between MTV and the cricket. The conversation is limited to arguments about who is going to make coffee next. I think I am entitled to a refund… or at least a discount. And by the way, this is how heaven feels for me.

And now I have to say something nice because The Viking also reads this blog. Seriously, it is actually very nice to be here, doubly so because I have just been told I have a better chance of getting impregnated by a pineapple than I have of getting my coffee with one of those small little biscuits you get in fancy coffee shops. Yes, I feel welcome.

So, my life over the last few days…

My sanity was given a stay of execution on Thursday. To a certain degree that is. Paw wasn't booked into hospital which meant that I didn't have to get Maw back behind the wheel and terrorising other road users. However, I was fully off the hook. I had to listen to Paw telling me how he hasn't used a public bathroom in X number of years. I think there is an award for achieving that on the Planet Zarg. Also how he refused to put his chin on the top of the X-ray board because "It's dirty." Maw and I agree it's a pity that he wasn't booked into hospital because being forced to come face to face with his fear would be an excellent punishment for not going to the doctor when he should have.

Also experienced was a practice session in how to impose extreme control on yourself and not to strangle the old man standing next to you who looks like your father. He was actually telling me how funny he finds the fact that Maw is stressing herself stupid because of him. Excuse me a sec, Dad, I think I saw a dispensary around the corner.

There are many other little anecdotes I could probably bore myself with but I think it's time to lay the Maw and Paw saga to rest. I know I have pretty much had my fill.

For non-South Africans and other parts of the world not in the throws of hot cross buns, Easter bunnies and chocolate eggs, we are in the middle of our Easter Weekend. Friday was Easter Friday, it is one of two public holidays that the slaves where Flyboy works are allowed to take off. For me it was a day filled with surprises, nice ones for a change. Flyboy actually suggested we take a drive in a direction we have never been before and 'go and see stuff. This is one of my favourite activities which clash with his favourite activities so we don't do it at all. To make a long story short, we bonded, we laughed, we chatted and we discovered that we stay in a really beautiful part of the country. So, either the shape shifting aliens are still poking and prodding the Real Flyboy or I should definitely go away for two weeks more often. Could there be hope for our relationship?

If anyone ever flies 1 Time please remember to have money with you on the plane. Your free meal/snackie type thing is no longer free, you have to pay for it and you get to choose what you want from a menu. I didn't know this, no one told me about it. When the hostess/stewardess came around I had to politely decline purchasing any snacks and pretend that I am 'above the rest of these plebs sitting there scoffing down rather yummy looking muffins and biltong and... excuse me, are you going to finish that coffee?'

It's been quite some time since I was in confined spaces with strangers and it was an olfactory experience of note. The lady in front of me in the queue smelt of hot cross buns. I am not complaining! Another gentleman on the plane, one row in front of me reminded me of the Greek myth about Achilles. Remember Achilles was dipped in a magic potion but the only part that wasn't protected was his ankle where the dipper was holding him? Well, this gentleman was dipped into a vat of aftershave or deodorant or something. He was really nice smelling and it would have been a treat because Flyboy doesn't use nice smelling stuff but sheesh, dude, go easy with the application!

However, the staff at 1 Time were really friendly, the flight wasn't bad at all, no vomiting but just a bit cold. And their prices are mind blowing when one considers what we are used to paying for airfare.

As for tales from Sodom and Gamorrah... I am working on them. The city is just 'not funny.'